Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Gaia (jē'ə) or (Guy-Uh) part 1

Gaia, who is she? She is what most of us would consider home. This is true irregardless of having been afforded a view of her from outer space. The word Gaia originates from the Greek goddess of the earth, the same whore who spawned and married Uranus only to have become the mother of the Titans and the Cyclopes. Gaia, taken into the context of today's science, is the living Earth. She is unique from her dead rock brothers and sisters: Venus, Mars, and Mercury.

Throughout human history our understanding of the world and our place in it has evolved. We went from thinking that the world was flat fearing that we could fall off its edge to one day sailing around it and realizing that there was an unreachable horizon. Newton laid the groundworks in Physics for Einstein. Einstein introduced the theory of relativity and scholars like Hawking have expanded upon it. Our knowledge of the enviornment and the way things work will never be definite and complete. The greatest of minds have formed all of the current theories that we hold true and faithful today. When it comes to taking action against global warming we have theories about theories, or as I like to call them, opinions.


Theories about Theories: aka Opinions

I used to be an ignorant skeptic on the matter of the Earth and her well-being. The world appeared to be unscathed by anything I did to it. I saw no remorse in littering, using airconditioning on a hot day, or leaving the night light on in fear of the Candy Man. I had no idea that I was ruining ecosystems, contributing to CO2 pollution, and putting pressure on engineers to develop new sources of renewable energy, all in the same day.

Since my days as a tike I have acquired a basic understanding of biology, chemistry, physics, and oceanography. When I learned about all these disciplines they made sense to me. Meanwhile I was also being pushed to learn about catholicism. I was better able to identify with mitochondria being used to generate energy than praying for strength from an invisible man. All of the above subjects fascinated me but I never performed well in any of them, except for oceanography of course. With my broad understanding of them all I can at least tell that they all came together in a mysterious and majestic way in the world of Gaia. I didn't have what it took to become a scientist or an engineer, but that's ok. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that something drastic is happening to our beautiful home Gaia.

Gaia is a theory that the Earth is a living and self-regulating system in which all forms of life we know inhabit. It surpasses Darwin's theory of evolution and perplexes us to think of the entire planet as a whole rather than just in terms of the survival of an individual species. Everything we know about geology, oceanography, biology, chemistry can fall below the theory of Gaia.

It's time to stop thinking of the planet as if it were a dead terrestrial rock. It has feelings, too.

To be continued...

~Anthans

Monday, March 30, 2009

For now, Taxes not so Taxing

I can't imagine that someday in the future I will be placing into a higher tax bracket. For the past four years my work history has been fragmented. Between on-campus jobs and internships I have never endured a job for longer than 1.5 years. Whose to say that this will ever change?

In the meantime I can enjoy a refund from the IRS because I made little to no money last year. After all, tax breaks go to those less fortunate and those that make the cover of Fortune. It will be some time until I place into the latter.

~Anthans

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Like, you know, um...

In regards to everyday speech I can't think of anything that bothers me more than someone who chronically uses the space fillers of like, you know, and um. There are exceptions to using these words, but never in the context of space fillers.

"So um, like I was the movies yesterday and like there were these kids that couldn't, you know, get into the theater cause it was like a rated R movie. So then, like all the kids in their group like um, went to one of the exits of the theater, you know, the ones you come out of after a movie. And then like they waited there for a few minutes until some people, um, came out of a movie that had just ended. And then all these kids like snuck into the theater. And like, yeah."


Like

Surely you know people who speak like this. However, there are exceptions to using these words when they are used in the right context. In my previous sentence "surely you know people who speak like this" I use the word 'like' to compare my subject in question to the conversation style that was being referenced above. If it is possible to substitute the word 'like' with 'similar to' or 'such as' then the use of 'like' is acceptable. "Sure you know people who speak similar to this." This is the way the word 'like' was intended to be used, not as a catch phrase for your brain farts. If you want to refrain from using 'like' as a space filler, simply pause during your speech. You'll be able to gather your thoughts better for the next brilliant thing you're about to say.


You know


Oftentimes we become entangled in whatever it is we may be talking about and our mind is moving a lot faster than our mouth is. We'll often stumble in our speech as the rate of our mouth moving is not capable of keeping up with our mile-a-minute thinking pattern. The space filler of "you know' will often be inserted in order to retain the attention of our listeners.

"Some of these girls I meet at the bar are so stuck up, they need to get real, you know? I don't even know why I bother sometimes."

The threat of losing our peer's interest in our story forces us to regurgitate anything to keep the conversation going. I think they're called affirmatives in speech or something (like/such as) that. Here are some other affirming space fillers that allow us to link combos in our sentences:

  • You feel me?
  • Know what I'm sayin'?
  • Ya' dig?
  • Know what I mean?
  • Follow me so far?
Affirmatives in our speech will vary from region to region but their purpose is always the same: to keep the story going without being interrupted. There are other ways to keep the story going besides using dialogue. One method which I described earlier was the pause. Another is the use of body language and gestures. This of course doesn't work over the phone. By bringing a visual image to your message you can take away the attention from the fact that you have stopped speaking and are internally gathering your thoughts.

"That cute girl who works at Wal-Mart was checking me out yesterday...(insert body language to simulate the action of scanning products at a cash register)...every time she scanned my stuff I felt like donating sperm."

Try it out and have some fun. You may become quite the bard, or what is known in today's society as the socialite.


Um

Ummmm.....do I really need to elaborate on this one? Just try not to use it and more people will be prone to listen to what you have to say. It's distracting and oftentimes reminds us of how boring you are or your incapability of saying anything meaningful.


~Anthans